SOLKAT

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You and the stranger both like homestuck.

You: 2up

Stranger: YO SOL

Stranger: YOU ARE AN GIRL NOW ?

You: yeah ii am a giirl now

Stranger: WOW

Stranger: I KNEW IT

Stranger: YOU'LL DO IT

You: what do you mean?

Stranger: THAT YOU WERE SO FEMININ IN THE LAST TIME CRYING AND SHIT

Stranger: LIKE YOU HAVE THESE DAYS

Stranger: WHERE THE GIRLS ARE BLEEDING YOU KNOW

Stranger: ITS STILL KINDA CREEPY

You: ii know why are we talkiing about thii2!

Stranger: BECAUSE BRO

Stranger: YOU KNOW

Stranger: WE'RE BEST BROS RIGHT?

You: yeah we are

Stranger: I'M KINDA ANGRY

Stranger: YOOU SHOULD TELL ME BEFORE

Stranger: I WOULD TOTALLY UNDERSTAND IT

Stranger: MAYBE I WOULD THINK ITS KINDA WEIRD

You: yeah well blame eriidan!

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: WHAT DID HE DONE TO YOU

You: one word IIT!

Stranger: IF YOU WANT

Stranger: I'M GOING TO KILL HIM

You: plea2e do!

Stranger: I WILL BRO

Stranger: FOR SURE

Stranger: I MEAN YOU'RE AN GIRL NOW

Stranger: THATS...I HAVE TO HANDLE WITH IT

Stranger: ITS DIFFERENT YOU KNOW

Stranger: BUT MAN

Stranger: ITS OK

You: yeah ii know iit wiil bee hard two gety u2ed two

You: *get*

Stranger: YEA BUT I'LL HANDLE WITH THAT

Stranger: I MEAN OMG

Stranger: YOU HAVE TITS NOW

Stranger: DONT GIMMA THAT LAUGH

Stranger: OH A DOG

You: b 2u2h!

Stranger: WOOF

Stranger: WHATS HIS NAME?

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: WHAT THIS?

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: DONT TELL ME...

Stranger: THESE WERE ONE OF YOUR GENITALS...

You: my dog2 name ii2 mac and the thiing ii ju2t held up wa2 a vodo doll

Stranger: OH OK

Stranger: OH

Stranger: BTW

You: yeah

Stranger: YOURE AN GIRL NOW WHAT ABOUT YOUR DOOBLE DANGS?

Stranger: AWW SO CUTE

Stranger: THE OTHER DANG?

Stranger: SORRY MAN

Stranger: I KNOW

Stranger: IT SOUNDS GAY

Stranger: BUT

Stranger: I REALLY WANT TO KNOWW !!

You: ii diidnt thiink about that

You: ii have no iidea!

You: :'C

Stranger: SO...YOU WONT TELL ME YOU HAVE TITTIES AND TWO PENISES !?

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: BRO

Stranger: THATS CREEPY

Stranger: YOURE LIKE AN MUTANT

Stranger: DONT GIMMA THAT FACEPALM

You: iill giive you dat faceplam all ii want 2exy biitch

Stranger: HRRHRR I WOULD SAY BUT YOURE AN MUTANT NOW

Stranger: I'M KINDA SCARED

Stranger: FUCK

Stranger: MAN

Stranger: YOU

Stranger: HAVE

Stranger: TWO

Stranger: OF EVERYTHING

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: WHY?!

You: and you ju2t now fiigured that out?

Stranger: YES

Stranger: BUT ONE OF THESE PAIRS

Stranger: ARE TOTALLY

Stranger: BIG NOW

Stranger: AND NOT EVEN REAL

Stranger: WANA DANCE

Stranger: I CAN RAP

Stranger: I'M KARKALICOUS

Stranger: SO DELICOUS

Stranger: NO I DONT DO KISMISES

You: ummmmm.....2ure

Stranger: AND IF YOU READ ANY FANFICS

Stranger: ALL DAT SHIT IS FICTIOUS

Stranger: I'M KARKALICOUS

Stranger: SO DELIOUS

Stranger: SUPER SWEET

Stranger: SO DELIOUS

You: <3

Stranger: ...JUST NOW A MUTANT GAVE ME A HEART

Stranger: I FEEL KINDA FUCKED UP

You: 2TOP CALLIING ME THAT IIM 2TIILL THE 2AME TROLL YOU U2ED TWO KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stranger: WITH TITTIES

You: 2O WHAT!

Stranger: THESE ARE NOT YOU !

Stranger: OK YOU KNOW -

Stranger: REALLY ?

Stranger: I JUST WANTED TO BENICE ONCE

Stranger: BUT YOU KNOW WHAT

Stranger: FUCK YOU

Stranger: WO

Stranger: WOW*

Stranger: YOURE SUCH STUPPORN

Stranger: PORN?

Stranger: STUBBORN

Stranger: WHAT

Stranger: FUCK

Stranger: YOU KNOW

Stranger: WHAT I MEAN

Stranger: FUCK

You: okay let2 ju2t talk thii2 out liike the 2ophii2tiicated adult2 we are okay

Stranger: OK

Stranger: YOU BEGIN

Stranger: WANT TO SEE DAT ADULT SIDE OF YOURS

You: 2o what happened wa2 eriidan turned me iintwo a giirl and ii have been tryiing two fiigure out how two get back iintwo my male form and iit2 not workiing

Stranger: MYBE

Stranger: MAYBE*

Stranger: YOU SHOULD

Stranger: JUST

Stranger: EAT SOME CAKES

You: 2ome cake?

Stranger: SOME MALE COOL STUFF

Stranger: OR UNICORNS?

Stranger: YEA TRY THAT

You: why would ii eat a uniicorn theyre two pretty

Stranger: MAYBE YOU GET BACK TO MALE

Stranger: LOOK

Stranger: YOURE SO GAY

Stranger: NO WONDER WHY YOU CANT GET BACK TO YOUR BOY BODY

You: 2ut up and not only wa2 ii gay ii wa2 flu2hed for you!

Stranger: ....

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: SOLLUX

Stranger: I THINK THE GIRL BODY LET YOU THINK YOU LIKE ME

Stranger: WE DID IT JUST ONCE

Stranger: OH

Stranger: NO

Stranger: TWO ...THREE...

Stranger: YOU KNOW

Stranger: NOT ENOUGH TO FEEL FLUSHED FOR ME

Stranger: OR FELL IN RED

You: kk ii wa2 flu2ed for you way before thii2 ever happned

Stranger: YOU SURE

You: ye2 iim 2ure

Stranger: I LIKED YOU TOO BUT

Stranger: IF YOU CAN HANDLE YOUR TITS

Stranger: I WILL GO OUT WITH YOU

You: ii can handle my2elf kk

Stranger: YEA

Stranger: JUST...EH CUT THEM OFF

Stranger: OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT

You: here giive me a miinute

You: brb

Stranger: PLEASE DONT SHOW ME YOUR TITS

Stranger: PLEASE

You: ii wont

Stranger: GOOD

Stranger: I SEE LEGS

Stranger: OHO

Stranger: NICE

You: (( sollus isnt a girl any more))

You: sollux* derp))

Stranger: SO PRETTY MAN

Stranger: I KNEW YOU WOULD BE BACK

Stranger: SO

Stranger: LETS DO FUNNY THINGS

Stranger: LIKE EATING CAKE

You: okay

Stranger: SORRY

Stranger: I JUST ATE THE LAST PIECE OF IT

Stranger:

Stranger: URGH THAT LOOKS LIKE JOHN THIS SMILEY

You: who really care2 at lea2t iim a dude agaiin

Stranger: OH YEA

You: yeah

Stranger: YOUR BODY LOOKS MORE LIKE NOT A WOMAN NOW

You: oh no go fiigure

Stranger: HUH

You: ehe your a derp

Stranger: BUT STILL SOMEONE YOU CAN FELL IN RED WITH

You: yeah totally ii liike that about you

Stranger: I KNOW

Stranger: I'M TOO COOL FOR THIS PLANET

You: ehe 2o am ii

Stranger: HAHAHA REALLY KARKAT

You: iim 2orry but iim not kk 2orry

Stranger: OOPS

Stranger: IT'S BECAUSE OF THIS STUPID ALICE BESIDE ME

Stranger: SHE'S TALKING SHIT ABOUT KARKAT

Stranger: ME

Stranger: ME KARKAT

Stranger: YOU KNOW

Stranger: WAIT I WILL GIVE HER A BAD LOOK

Stranger: SHE'S READING YAOI

You: yeah how about ii 2ee thii2 aliice

Stranger: SHE SITS ON MY BED

Stranger: WAIT

Stranger: EHHHH

Stranger: THE YAOIS ARE FROM HER

Stranger: NOT FROM ME

Stranger: YES.

Stranger: EVERY 55 YAOI MANGA

Stranger: I DONT KNOW

You: ii liike yaoii

Stranger: I'M NOT AN HOMOSEXUAL

You: oh 2o now your john

Stranger: JOHN ?

Stranger: WHAT WITH HIM

You: well you ju2t 2aiid you not a homo and he 2ay2 that all the tiime

Stranger: LOL

Stranger: BECAUSE HE S A FUCKASS

You: iim watchiing 2olkat viideo2

Stranger: THESE ARE MOTHERFUCKING-

Stranger: DONT

Stranger: MOVE AROUND

Stranger: LIKE THAT

Stranger: YOU'RE

Stranger: MAKING

Stranger: STOP

Stranger: DAT

Stranger: SHIT

Stranger: OMG

Stranger: I'LL KILL YOU

You: no

Stranger: DATS MOTHERFUCKING NOT FUNNNY

Stranger: STOP

Stranger: I DONT WANT TO SEE YOUR FUCKING MOVEMENTS

Stranger: STOP

Stranger: WHAT

Stranger: DON

Stranger: T

Stranger: FSDJHFJD

Stranger: FUCK DAT SHIT

Stranger: SOL

Stranger: I WILL

Stranger: TOTALLY KILL YOU

You: no iif ii dont end you fiir2t

Stranger: I'LL NEVER WILL

You: diid you forget about my lazer2

Stranger: NO BUT LOOK IN THESE EYES AND TELL ME AGAIN, YOU CAN KILL ME

You: ii can kiill you

Stranger: BASTARD

Stranger: FUCK ASS

Stranger: ILL KILL YOU FIRST

Stranger: I WILL BITCHSLAP YOU

You: no you wont becau2e you love me that much

Stranger: NO I WONT

Stranger: BUT BECAUSE YOURE MY BEST BRO

Stranger: DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY DAVE PORTRAIT ?

You: you drew dave?

Stranger: YES

Stranger: SAW HIM TODAY

You: okay then 2how me

You: oh wow

Stranger: I'LL DRAW YOU TOO

Stranger: OK

Stranger: WAIT

You: okay

Stranger: I KNOW YOU ENJOYED IT WHEN HAVING TITS

You: da fuck ii2 wrong wiith you!!!!!

Stranger: I KNOW YOU LONG ENOUGH

Stranger: NOTHING

Stranger: I JUST WANTED TO SHOW YOU HOW WEIRD YOU WERE

Stranger: REALLY

You: ju2t 2hut up and 2leep wiith me already

Stranger: WTF

Stranger: SOLLUC

Stranger: SOLLUX

Stranger: I'M BLUSHING

Stranger: YOU FUCKING WEIRD GUY

You: becau2e iim gay

Stranger: DATS REALLY WEIRD

You: no iit2 not!

Stranger: (( gotta go, see ya next time >____< sorry ))

IT IS MOTHERFUCKER

You: bye

Your conversational partner has disconnected.